BFF - Baby Fat Forever

That's Baby Fat all nestled between two moving vans
at Storage West. 

     We took our girl to the Storage center night before last.  This will be her home when she's not out carousing with all the other food trucks in town.  She looks a little lonely parked there between those big boys, but look at her; she'll charm them in no time.  With her sexy grill and cute little pink air scoop, she'll have those big fella's wrapped around her antenna before you can say backup camera.  (Because Baby Fat's a lady, I'll stay away from the headlight metaphors )
     This weekend, we peel the vinyl lettering off her sides and next week we take her in for a paint estimate.  After that comes the My Big Fat Cookie graphic design and then . . . . well we park her.  Using the model of; "plan your work and work your plan", Baby Fat will sit for while as we get our Big Fat Licenses, Big Fat Permits and Big Fat Certifications.
     I have never been much of a mechanic.  The night we brought Baby Fat home I tried to open the hood and couldn't find the release handle inside the cab of the truck.  I had watched Jazz, the previous owner pull on it several times to open the hood.  I knew it was located somewhere under the dashboard but I couldn't see it.  I looked for a good 10 minutes and then my patience ran out.  I started pulling on every knob I could see.  I knew the cable was stiff because when Jazz had pulled the handle he had to use both hands and put his weight behind it.  Ultimately I pulled so hard on one of the knobs the cable broke.  I knew I would never get the hood open.  It took me another 10 minutes to realize that the knob I had pulled belonged to a now broken cable which operated the vent on the passenger side of the cab. I still have not found the hood release.


First project:   Replace the ignition switch.
 Right now we have to start Baby Fat
with a screwdriver.  It's effective but tacky.

     I love to tinker, but as you can tell, I usually make things worse rather than better.  I have little patience for bolts that wont break free, threads that get stripped and parts that no matter the angle don't look like they belong together.  I once took apart the motor to a blender, to see how it worked, when I couldn't put it back together again I threw it away. I bought a broken grandfather clock one time with a plan to restore it; I threw it away.  I used to build model airplanes but I never quite finished them and I threw them away.  I've thrown so many of my projects away over the years that I should have tried out as a pitcher for a farm team!
          My wife, Donna is worried that I'll get discouraged with Baby Fat and that I wont be able to keep up with the mechanical demands of a 30 year old  P-30.  "You just wait" I told her.  "When you put your mind to something, magic can happen."  She rolled her eyes.  I continued; "She's old and was built before computers or electronic fuel injection.  I can do this!"  She rolled her eyes.  "My brother is a phone call away, with Skype it'll be just like he's here with me.  He can help me in real time"; I said.  She folded her arms across her chest and stared at me.  "What?" I said.   With an edge to her voice sharp enough to shave a 3 day old beard; "Skype your brother"; she demanded.  "Now?   Why?"; I asked.  "Well; if you're going to make magic happen, aren't you going to need to open that hood?"
     Do you need a Big Fat Cookie?